incubus

alone
nights find me
lost in ambivalent
thoughts of you.
i seek refuge
in the semi darkness
loath to sleep
afraid to see you
in my dreams.

mornings of discontent
bring no sunshine
to numb feelings.
cold hearts and tired limbs
douse the promise of spring
and i feel like a sad song
without an end.

a futile struggle, this
nightmare possessing me.
pangs of anger grow
inside throbbing breasts
searching for reservoirs
of splintered tears.
pain overcomes anger
yielding to emotions thawed
by a mere vision
enough to last me
till the morrow.

i only wished
to love rightly
and freely.
but what is right and free?

i'd rather
save the sunlight
than chase the rainbow.